Gone
by treehugger195
Summary: A mourningsong fic. that I made up! Hope you like!


Hey ya'll. Just a random story that does not really fit with any of the books! :) Hope you enjoy anyways!

Enjoy

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_I'm so tired of being here __  
__suppressed by all my childish fears __  
__and if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave __  
__because your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone._  
  
It had been a month since Stephen's death, and Jack still could not seem  
to get over it. He missed Stephen's beautiful, but sad eyes, the  
lightly shaded circles that surrounded them, his soft skin;  
everything about him that he loved was gone.  
  
_These wounds won't seem to heal __  
__this pain is just too real __  
__there's just so much that time cannot erase. _  
  
Tears fell from Jack's eyes. The memories were still fresh in his  
mind and the pain still burning in his heart. His friend was an all  
too recent memory in the present past. He could hear Stephen's rough  
voice and his light footsteps. Stephen was not to be forgotten.  
  
_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears __  
__when you scream I fight away all of your fears __  
__I held your hand through all of these years __  
__but you still have __  
__All of me._  
  
He could see Stephen. He sat quietly and looked over at Jack in an  
almost haunting silence. His expression showed that he was sad, his  
eyes were as pale as they were when he passed, and his skin was the same grey that colored him when he died. Jack held out a hand to stroke Stephen's face. He shuddered when his warm, rough skin touched the cold clammy skin over his friend. Stephen looked deep into Jack's eyes and a tear trailed down his cheek as he slowly faded into nothingness.  
_  
__You used to captivate me by your resonating light __  
__now I'm bound by the life you left behind __  
__Your Face it haunts my once pleasant dreams __  
y__our voice it chased away all the sanity in me._  
  
Every where he could see Stephen but always disappeared before Jack's eyes when other's approached.

In Jack's dreams, he could see Stephen. It was always the same dream. Stephen would be standing in the dark with a longing look upon his face, his arms stretched out as though waiting for an embrace. Jack would walk towards him until they were dangerously close and their lips were almost touching and all that could be heard was Stephen's shuttering breath. Jack laid his hand upon Stephen's cheek and they kissed gently and then separate slowly. Then there was that same heart-shattering sound of a gun being fired. Stephen's eyes got big and would take in a big shaking breath and looked down to see a bullet hole through his chest, where his heart was. Jack reached out to touch Stephen, but stops when Stephen falls in slow motion onto the ground.

Jack holds Stephen in his arms rocking him back and forth and finally Stephen gives his last breath with a weak, "I love you." Jack looks down and on Stephen's face is a tear from his misted eyes and everything goes black.

_These wounds won't seem to heal __  
__this pain is just too real __  
__there's just so much that time cannot erase._

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears_

_But you still have all of me._

Jack sat silently in his corner and watched as the other men laughed and talked. He couldn't understand how they could be so happy. Stephen was dead and there was nothing that Jack could do about it, but he wished that it had been him instead.

_I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone_

_But though you're still with me_

_I've been alone all along_

Jack walked slowly along the ship's deck and looked deep into the water. That was where his love was, that was where Stephen swam in its depths. Sometimes Jack wanted to jump in and rescue Stephen, but he couldn't. Stephen was dead, a fact that not even the bravest of men wanted to except.

_When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears_

_When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears_

_I held your hand through all of these years_

_But you still have all of me_

Jack held a rosary in his hands, it was Stephen's. He played with the beads in his hands. He didn't pray with it, he didn't know how, but he wish he did. He looked into the waters once more and saw a ghostly image of Stephen's face.

"I have to let this go," Jack whispered. He looked at the rosary for moment and then out into the water. He held out his hand and felt the beads slip through his fingers and fall into the ocean. He looked down at the water and whispered, "Stephen, I love you," and walked slowly and faded into the darkness of the night.


End file.
